Hey, maybe you’re lost and just stumbled on my page.. I’m Kisha by the way. I’m still 19 and yes I know I look older. And I have never thought of it as a disadvantage anyway… It’s no big deal. Looks are just looks. I’m cool with it. ;)
No, I didn’t create a post to give a review about Whiz Khalifa’s song, but to actually give you a hint of how my life has been the past few weeks. And to better understand it, I’m going to explain each and every detail using Khalifa’s YOUNG, WILD, AND FREE. *hugs*
YOUNG
To be honest, it’s so hard to think of something to relate with, but maybe.. FEELING AND STAYING YOUNG could be accepted. Now, wish me luck as I’d try to connect the two on what I have experienced the past weeks…
Again, I’m 19 and I don’t really feel old. I don’t really feel young either. Tama lang. And there starts the confusion. Where am I heading to?! Well, even if I don’t feel … OH I JUST REMEMBERED SOMETHING. HERE WE GO. SRSLY.
Insecurities came in and out of my system lately. What do I suppose to mean with “came in and out”? Well, came in, obviously… Thought of being REALLY insecure (to whom? WAIT A MINUTE.) And oh came out, my loving friends helped me realize that there’s no need to feel such because I AM AMAZING JUST THE WAY I AM. Well, I know right, Bruno Mars never failed to say that to me whenever I listen to his song. Oh well, anyway… THIS IS SERIOUSLY CRAZY. HAHAHA.
But really serious this time, I know being insecure would be the very last thing you’d ever thought I’d be… but hey, you’re wrong. It’s pretty normal for a woman like me but what makes it abnormal is the fact that I LET IT AFFECT ME. And as expected, I become someone that I am not and end up regretting. It’s never really good. Right now, I’m still trying my very best to feel real good about myself… to feel young, to feel beautiful. No it’s not hard if you’re with your mom always because she’d never ever get tired of saying … “You’re so beautiful, nak.” But when you’re mixed with other people, with different personalities, faces, bodies, beauties… You feel like everything is just not right. And you wish that other people would have your mom’s eyes. You know. THAT FEELING.
God is not happy with what I’m saying, I know. But I’m just saying the truth, Oh Lord. But don’t worry… I just learned the perfect lesson for this. “You cannot change/control the things around you, but you can always CONTROL the WAY you REACT on them.” I believe I just have to put this into action. KAYA KO TO.
If you still ask how connected it is to being/feeling YOUNG, oh well… YOU’RE TOO YOUNG TO LIVE WITH YOUR INSECURITIES. SHAKE IT OFF, SISTER.
WILD
Oh no!!! Please don’t be too dirty minded! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Or wait, I think I’m being one?! O_O lol. JUST KIDDING :)))))))))))
Seriously, life has been really WILD the past few weeks. I can’t believe I just described my life as WILD !!! Definitely an overstatement! Sorry! ☺ Anyway, I just wanna clear things that WILD doesn’t always pertain to something negative. I believe there’s also some positive about the word. And I’m sorry I don’t know how to explain it… In time, you’ll know it yourself. *wink*
But hey, I’ve been into a LOT of crazy FIRST times this summer. And they’re all UNFORGETTABLE. I’m sure it’s something I WON’T regret, in one way or another. I won’t be sharing all my first times… but there’s this first time I just did recently that made me realize that ALCOHOL INDEED KNOWS HOW TO SWIM.
You’re right! No, it’s not my first time to drink, but it’s my first time to get DRUNK! And no, it’s not something that I’m proud of because it definitely didn’t do me any good. But I loved the fact that I’ve come to know another side of myself and the other fact that I did it with my crazy, awesome friends who never ever left my side as I transformed into some kind of girl maoy for hours! And now they’re naming me as Maoy Queen. That’s just the best name ever! Makes me want to hide under my blanket forever!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :’(
It was both a memorable and embarrassing experience, but one thing’s for sure.. I WON’T DO IT AGAIN. I didn’t like the after effects. Thinking about it makes me want to vomit T.T
Assuming that getting drunk is like getting wild … Oh well, getting wild is good SOMETIMES. But make sure you do it with people you trust so much. ;)
FREE
To tell you honestly, there’s nothing that’s making me feel free these days… Oh well, aside from Xavier for granting two weeks of academic freedom, duh?
I am still the same old me, dependent of my mother. Whatever she wants me to do, I do it. She wants me to graduate next March, so I will graduate. She doesn’t want me to go laag, then I won’t go. She wants me to go with her, I go with her. No, I’m not complaining. I’m just saying that being dependent on my mother is not really like she’s trying to control my life… because I know now that she just wants the best for me and she’s guiding me unto the right direction. In short, I just plainly believe that MOTHER’S KNOW BEST. And I will always be forever thankful for my Mom for every little thing. ♥
Talking about graduation, I only have one year left till the finish line!!! I just can’t believe I survived three years in college! Three years full of dramas, problems, pressures, love, and everything! I will forever be thankful for Xavier University for helping me become the person that I am now. :) I won’t be this spiritually close to God, I won’t be this confident when it comes to sharing my talents, I won’t be having this kind of heart if it’s not because of XU… *teary eyed* :’) Oh well, one year is still long… A lot of things might happen but one thing’s for sure… I’LL MAKE THE MOST OUT OF MY LAST YEAR IN SCHOOL. THIS YEAR’S GOING TO BE AWESOME. ♥
This is the very first time I allowed myself to be too talkative on my blog. And I really hope I made sense, in one way or another. But if you think I didn’t, well I still want to thank you for reading up to this part. HAHAHA. Thank you very much. I owe you a lot. *hugs*
I don’t know when’s going to be the next time I’ll do something like this, or what song title I am going to use… It doesn’t matter anyway. I just hope and pray that this blog won’t just let you know of my thoughts, but in a way, would help you find something to be inspire with… ♥
